While I was in LA from January 2, 2005 to January 6, 2005, I met up with a friend I have not seen since 1988. The guy looks the same, cute as ever comparing to me who has gained a whopping 40 pounds. I was lucky that I actually missed the heavy rain that came the week before, and on the 6th the rain came down again as we headed back to Vegas for the Consumer Electronic Show and the Porn Convention which I ended up going to neither. My friend, Andrew, hitched a ride with me and Gary to spend more time with us. We stayed at the Harrah’s Las Vegas Hotel and Casino. This hotel is boring as hell, but Gary and I gamble exclusively at Harrah’s, so our room was comp by the casino.

That Thursday evening, Andrew convinced me and Gary to go with him to a “new bar”on the Strip, Krave. Here is the shocker, I rarely ever go to the bars anymore, and I really did not want to go since gambling and watching bad cable TV is much more appealing to me. Andrew insisted that we go with him to this HustlaBall that was being held at Krave and that he knows one of the organizer and his friends. We walked on the Strip to the Aladdin Hotel Casino and discovered that Krave is literally attached to the Aladdin on the far right side looking at the Casino from the Strip. As we approached Krave around 11:00 PM, there were about five hundred people standing in two lines outside of the club. Tall, short, slim, fat, hunk, male, female, you name it, we were all there. I wanted to turn around and head back to my hotel room but Andrew insisted that we hang out in the VIP line. This unorganized mess of people including me was just standing there; really did not know what to do, how we were going to get in, how much the ticket cost etc… Miraculously, after standing around for only 10 minutes, one of the doormen recognized Andrew and we were whisked in to the club and paid only $20 per person at the door, leaving a throng of people behind. THE celebrity life – light, camera, action! AND we did not even have to buy bottle service to get in fast.

I want my fellow readers to know ahead that this review piece will be biased because I am not a fan of crowded clubs and bad “gay club techno music”. Mr. Andrew immediately hooked up with some of the people he recognized from LA and Gary and I meandered through the crowd for a rest room stop. After our bathroom duty, we headed to the bars and ordered two cranberry soda waters and stood in the section looking straight ahead at the stage.

HustlaBall was started by Tom Weise and Jeffrey Davids and they promote various events throughout the US and the world. You can read more about them through the net. There was going to be a show with all kind of porn stars and personalities including the porn director, Chi Chi La Rue. Unfortunately for me and Gary, we just don’t have the strength, stamina and patience to wait until the wee hours for the show to start. We spent about 1 ½ hour listening to really bad techno music (the same thumping beat) on a bad sound system and watching some skinny dancers, including one that was so slim that I swear his legs can fit through my shirt sleeves, trying to prance around on stage. My Cinderella syndrome kicked in and Gary and I said our goodbyes and headed back to the comfort of our penny slots at Harrah’s. I have declared both of us as two old boring queens. I feel bad that there were many people who had to stand in line for an hour to get in; therefore, I felt obligated to stay longer and enjoy it more. The reality of it is that I did not enjoy it more despite my friend Andrew’s description of what was going on in the VIP area where you can have you favorite dancer perform a lap dance. He also reminded me that had I was willing to stand there for an extra hour, I would have witnessed a really wild show with Chi Chi La Rue as MC, and the talents included the Las Vegas show dancers, Men Magazine’s Men of the Year, Zeb Atlas. Act two had the incredible, Queen of the Strip, Frank Marino (his show, La Cage at the Rio is very good) and a list of porn stars longer then Paris Hilton’s Sidekick II phone list.

In the end, even though it is not my cup of tea, I am glad I experienced a sample of it. That what life is about and just because I don’t enjoy something, it does not mean that I will never experience it. I just hope that slim dancer had something good to eat after the ball.